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Do No Harm..


I speak to a lot of people in my profession as a Intuitive.  Clients call for information on their love life, career and money. But the topic that really intrigues me is relationships.

Not just the opposite sex relationships, but our family and friend relationships.

I have heard many stories about someone feeling that they are being dissed by a family member; being it a sister, or an in-law (out-laws as my oldest sister calls them!)  Or a co-worker, friend, child, spouse and everyone in between.

Time and time again, I start to hear the regurgitation of the “same-story-but-a-different-day” from clients, friends and family, about someone in their life that has done them wrong in some way. They tell me how they are upset by this remark, or this behavior or how they were ignored at this family get together, or this co-worker pushed them under the bus with the boss……it goes on and on.

I will say it here…. “The hardest thing we will EVER have to deal with in this life is RELATIONSHIPS- ALL relationships!”

But it is also only in relationship do we GROW the most! Relationships are a RISK!  They hurt! They push, they stretch us and most of all they TEACH us. We GROW from these relationships…but it’s a lot of work too!

I find so many people are not willing to take the biggest risk of all with their relationships.  And that risk is telling the truth.  THE TRUTH as we see it and feel it.

Not telling the truth is LYING.  Lying is wrong on any level, but us woman are taught that HURTING someone is the cardinal sin of all!  So this is where we have the conflict.  We think “If I tell them the truth about how their behavior hurt me or someone I love, then I would hurt them. So I can’t hurt  them, so I’ll just suck it up and move on”.

The problem is THAT WE DON’T MOVE ON.  We stuff and stuff each and every  hurt, and soon we start to get sick, or we act out in other ways (stuffing our faces, or drinking and other self-medicating things like emotion shopping!) When it gets REALLY bad- we start making our own little “pokes” or avoid their calls, we stop going over for holidays, we pull away.  We do this all to avoid hurting others, but that is all B.S.! We are avoiding being honest.  We are avoiding the risk of them not hearing us, or lashing out at us, we are avoiding our OWN PAIN in NOT being honest with others.

YOU ARE DOING A DIS-SERVICE To people in your life by NOT TELLING THEM THE TRUTH.

By NOT telling your mother-in-law that you are upset that she is not treating your children with support and respect, is teaching your children that this behavior is OK!  But you’re also HURTING your mother-in-law, because you are not giving her the answer to her questions…”Why don’t I have good relationships with my grand-children. Why don’t my grand-children ever call or come over?”  YOU HAVE THE ANSWER, GIVE TO HER.  Let her make a different choice. But if she is unaware of her behavior, she can never change it.

You KNOW that your best friend says hurtful things to her 6 year-old daughter, like she is “getting chubby”, you know it’s is undermining the child’s self-esteem, even if the mother THINKS she is “helping” the child.  You had this kind of “helpful” mother, and you have the scars to prove it!  Let her know what she is doing.  Stop the madness and the damage that is being done to children that will soon be wounded adults.  YOU CAN CHANGE A CHILD’S life by being a involved, aware, and honest friend to their mother.

If your sister/brother/friend makes cutting remarks about your work, your husband/wife, your house, your life- and you ALLOW them to continue this time after time, you are teaching them how to treat you.  They may be  acting out somethings that may have nothing to do with you, but as long as you are playing their punching bag, they will continue to use you as their outlet.  Even the abuser is being a victim in someway. Help them SEE what they are doing.

Being honest does NOT equal MEAN or confrontational in a negative way.  Being honest to another in a loving and compassionate way is a GIFT.  A gift of insight. A gift of truthfulness. A gift of Love.

A great quote by Neale Donald Walsch from Conversations with God is, “It’s not how well the message is received as much as how it is given.”  It is not up to us how another takes our truth, but our greatest responsibility is to give it lovingly, compassionately and honesty.

Be honest, in helping yourself to address things that hurt you, you in return are helping the other person to see themselves and giving them a gift of knowledge to make adjustments but if they choose to cut off the relationship or to lash out at you, then you know that you did all that you could, then release them with love, and know that you Did No Harm.

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Enough?

Originally written for http://www.TeeMcBee.com Newsletter

A few years ago I saw a movie, “Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood”.   There was a scene in the movie between a daughter and her father; the roles played by Sandra Bullock and James Gardner.

In the scene the daughter asked, “Daddy, were you loved enough?” That simple question touched me so deeply, and still does even all these years later.

“Were you loved enough? Being loved enough….what does that mean?

As I pondered this question, I became curious as to how other people might respond. I put out an email asking some friends: Were you loved enough?

One friend, Linda, offered that when she is in meditation with God – that is when she feels loved enough.   Another friend, Wendy, said that it’s when she is in relationship with someone and there is respect and acceptance from that person, that she feels loved enough. One new friend was very upfront with her feelings on the subject – she said “Honey, that’s a biggy. I’ll need lots of time and a BIG bottle of wine!”

Where you loved enough?

As I waited for my friends’ responses, I went inside my own life for MY answer to that question: Was Iloved enough?

As I thought upon that simple question, my mind started racing at blinding speed back through my life.

I thought about my marriage that ended in divorce. No, I didn’t feel loved enough, because we couldn’t get past our differences.

Back some more:

I reviewed the relationship with my grandmother. She loved me, and I really loved her–but we didn’t have enough time together.  I never got to enough

Going back some more.

My siblings: Now these relationships are some of my most difficult–for they knew me in all my NOT so stellar moments, as I was trying to learn about life and love. But, some of them do not seem to see me as I am now, only as who I was then.  These relationships can be loving, but enough? No.

So now we come to my very first relationship:

My Mom. This relationship is my foundation relationship, and all others are based on it. Talk about LOADED! I don’t know how your relationship was with your Mom, but mine has taught me some major lessons this time around. She recently left this life, and we had great closure. But, was I loved enough? No, not even close.

In reflecting on the question “Was I loved enough?” I arrived at an insight that was COMPLETELY unexpected…

I found that the one person that never loved me enough was ME.

I was so touched by this simple question in that movie because my soul knew that NO ONE can ever love me enough until I love myself enough first!

One of my wise friends, Mary Ann Burrows, wrote her answer to this question… she said it so elegantly: “Being loved enough, is to know that I am love so that I no longer need (that) input from others. Nor could I be affected by others inability to love.”

To love and to be loved is every person’s basic need, whether they realize it or not.

When I started this little exercise, I placed my “being loved enough” on others in my life. Now I’m looking in the right place. I’m learning to love myself enough, so that when in relationship with others, I don’t need them to fill my basic needs, for I’m doing that for myself and their love can be what it should be – a cherry on the top!

So I ask you, “Do you love yourself enough?”

Beam me down Scotty!

  

 This a.m. I was somehow drawn to a short story by O.Henry. I had never read his work before. It was very    different style of writing. Then I felt a “inspired” energy  flow over me and this entry is what came out. I believe  that my spirit teachers have told me how  REINCARNATION happens…

 

The arrival of this woman into this strange land was not noticed by the other participants in this new world. She was effortlessly dropped down into the center of this city without a sound. She is not scared to find herself here, she was accustomed to this treatment, and she had become strangely comforted by these adventures. Even though at first they jolt her and she gasps in her breath and holds it until she can hold it no more. Then she releases’s it and with that, she seems to feel grounded once more. With this action she then is squarely in this new world and the excitement of adventure starts to build once again.

What strange and wonderful things will be laying in wait for her? Will this new world offer her fun and adventure, or pain and dankness. She has found herself in both kinds of worlds before; she has learned that those kinds of worlds all hold innumerable lessons that needed to be experienced. A long time ago, she has learned not to judge them, all have been a great value to her and her experience. Even with that knowing, each time she finds herself in a new world her mind races to see which one will it be?

It is like a time warp had happened, all the people and activities seem to go into slow motion and at a precise moment she is added to the action, she is inserted at just the right millisecond and then the action starts to race back to it’s regular pace and she is absorbed in- without a blirp! She finds this to be a miracle that she is honored to be a part of.

She looks around this new world and she gulps once more with the first step she takes in this new worlds energy and soon she is picked up in the flow and her memory of how she entered it soon dissipates with the movement around her.

But she still has awareness of this new trip and she is in awe as people and events are pulled to her like she is a magnet. The perfect experiences wrapped up in in-perfect wrapping. Her quest is to find the string that will un-wrap these gifts and find its perfection inside. She relish’s this quest, it’s the purpose of these little excursions, the purpose of her life.

She embraces it at least for a time until she falls into forgetfulness, forgetfulness of the mission of her quest. But she is all to aware that that too is part of this journey, the forgetfulness is the only way she can fully merge with this new world, to really experience it in all it’s glory – the forgetfulness is the only way it can happen. She doesn’t worry about that part anymore, in the past the part of forgetfulness was the part she liked the least, but she has learned to embrace it – it’s the Only Way. She resists no more….she lets the forgetfulness to elope her, to cress her and lull her into it’s self – she floats and allows it to work its magic upon her.

Now let the action begin – I’m all in.     (the END)

4th of July Madness..

The 4th of July brings my focus to NOISE POLLUTION.  It is an issue that can get me fired up in no time.  I have been a country girl for 16 years when I lived out in Medina on 4 acres.  I liked it, no – I LOVED it!  You can appreciate your thoughts in a quite place.

However, things and locations change and I find myself in an apartment building in Lakewood Ohio.  Lakewood’s not such a bad place, lived here many years ago – they are a pain with the cops and drinking and driving, but I don’t partake in that kind of behavior anymore, so the transition was easy.

I chose an old apartment building that is at the end of Lake Road.  I love Lake Road for its beautiful large old homes and the quaint feeling it exudes.   Have driven this road for many years going out to my sisters and mom’s house in Avon Lake, this road and I share  memories…. Therefore, when I was told in a vision from my guides that I would move here- I was stunned (never wanted to live in an apartment) and was not sure I could even afford the rents that this area would require.  However, with anything in my life, I have learned to trust the insight from my guides and said “Ok, if this is what I need to do – then make it happen.”  A few months later, they did just that.

But before I signed a lease, I had some things to work out- one, I need QUITE; I was assured that this building would give me that (by the manger and soon to be previous tenant).  Doing the kind of work that I do (Psychic/Medium) I am very sensitive to noise, I have to be – it is in the tiny little feelings and sounds that I get my information from my guides, and that sensitivity allows me to be the best at what I do. But on the flip of the coin, it makes me more sensitive to all the noise pollution that is around.

I live on the fourth floor.  I hate curtains, and people looking into my space- so this position allows me more freedom on those counts.  And best of all I figured it would be above the noise in the area.

WELL, to my devastation- that is not the case.  My location seems to be sponge for the constant car traffic!  But not only that, but I can hear EVERYTHING.  I tired having a class here with the windows open and it was a battle to be heard over the noise pollution of the area.

It is a quant area, and I love that people walk their dogs and ride their bikes – but my problem is all the excessive noise they make.  Why is it that little girls scream for no reason? And dogs bark – forever, before their owners even think they should go see what the problem is?  That men feel that the bottle rocket between their thighs has to have the loudest sound too!

I have lived here for a few months and no one told me that this location is a bevy of “events”. I have had deal with one bike race, one running race and one parade (the 4th). They block off the roads for all these events and I am prevented from leaving out my garage or returning if I was able to get out.

I was un-aware of one of the races and it happened to coincide with a class I was having at my apartment– my students were driving around and around in circle until the roads re-opened. Thanks Lakewood!

For the parade, I have listened all day to people coming and setting up chairs and lemonade stands in front of my apartment and proceeding to listen to  children and dogs fighting and crying.  I even had neighbors in the building next door throw a party with corn whole games, fire pits and smoke bombs that came into my windows even though they were closed!

The road in front of my house was not only having the parade but I live a short distance from Lakewood Park – so the entire day was full of events and then topped off with fireworks. (which I have to admit was STUNNING in my apartment windows!  I had the best view with out all those people! LOVED IT!)…..now back to my complaining! :0

I wanted to spend the day just writing.  I have lots of work to do and a quite fourth was a treat for me. I have been dealing with six apartments in my building getting a major overhaul of remodeling for the last 3 weeks.  I hear drills, and floor sanders, and hammers and yelling men all day long. And this coming week we are getting a new roof installed. I witnessed the massive trucks delivering all the materials for the roofing job and it will all be happening on my head – since I am the top floor!  I was just hoping that I could have a quite fourth to get my thoughts on paper before the on-slot of noise…But the best laid plans….I never knew that the Lakewood parade would be in my front yard!

Oh, I know what you are all thinking….she is a crabby old woman.  But you might never have lived in an apartment building and had to work in your home too. Please note: I have not told you about the “noise of my apartment – the every morning yelling of the 2 children that live in the apartment across my court yard – the one HATES vegetables and I get to hear it all in echo! – those are REGULAR apartment noises – I understand that!) You just do not get away from all the construction and noise.

This past week – just as I was getting ready for a phone reading with a client, my lovely neighbor decided that he wanted to go through his old record collection and listen to it on HIGH volume. It was 6:30 pm and I had to talk over the very CLEAR sounds of Queen singing “I’m am the Champion!’. It was so loud the client asked if I had a radio in the background!  This walk down memory lane continued until way after midnight.  WHAT WAS HE THINKING?  That he lives on an island in the Pacific? Well, I certainly wish I did!

Cars driving by, dogs barking insistently, car alarms being set or going off, children screaing their lungs out, parents yelling at them at the top of their lungs, motorcycles roaring by, horns being blown, trucks breaking, music blaring, ………..

Don’t people consider other people?  I take into consideration my noise.  I have my car locking beep set to low, I do not play music at high volume and if I want to – I PUT ON HEADPHONES, I keep my TV at a normal volume, and I have parties that end between 10-11pm.  I do not have conversations in my apartment hallway.  When I listen to music in my car with my windows down – I turn down the volume when I sit at a light – so others aren’t getting my music blaring over their own.

I realized I am not the only person in the world.  I am a part of the world.  I try to consider others in my decisions when it comes to noise.  I think if more people did, it would not be such a noisy place to live.

THINK   OF    OTHERS   – PLEASE

M E M O R I E S…in the corners of my mind…………

This past weekend my friend stayed over at my apartment, she came to participate in my ArmChair Workshop.  Typically, people who stay over usually come on Friday and leave out on Sunday a.m., but this time my friend was staying over until Monday afternoon.

It was a bright early Monday morning and I was stirred from my drugged state of physical exhaustion caused by my busy weekend.  All I could think of was coffee, and lots of it.  I got out of bed with that one thought.  I hobbled out of my bedroom on feet screaming obscenities at me for walking and standing for hours at the event-, they hated that, and were having their revenge on me in this early hour. I believe when I crawled into bed and I was 51 but with every step I take – I was starting to believe I had to be 80!  With each step it was followed by an “Ouch”, I entered the living room and that is when it hit me – like a bucket full of ice water.

Oh MY GOD! It’s Monday! My hands flew in the air, my hair stood on end and I felt my blood pressure hit into my head.  I went to run to the door then stopped and turned back toward the hallway that led to the bedrooms. But I said, NO! And stopped once again and turned back to the door – I was doing a poor imitation of the Curly’s, Three Stooges, trademark circle dance.  I was panicked, I couldn’t think about anything but, “HER CAR WAS ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD!

As I was doing my Curly Dance, I kept sayings “WHERE’S HER KEYS???? WHERE IS HER KEYS????? SHOULD I WAKE HER, NO! DON’T WAKE HER, WHERE’S HER KEYS???? I HAVE TO WAKE HER???

I ran to the guest room – threw open the door! And screamed, “CAROLYN, WHERE’S YOUR KEYS??? THEY ARE GOING TO TOW YOUR CAR! WHERE’S YOUR KEYS!!!!  You would have thought she was a cat the way she jumped up to the ceiling! She stumbled around saying “I haven’t seen them since Friday!”

It was like a scene in a Three Stooges movie! She was doing her imitation of Larry – (where was Moe, he usually has a plan!)  I was trying to think, was it 7am or 7:30am? Where are my shoes, do I have time to find my shoes?  I threw open the hall closet door and pulled out the first shoes I found.  They were the electric green clompers my sister Traci swears if she ever sees me in public wearing them- I will be one sister short! I put them on anyway!

By the grace of God, the wayward keys were found in what seemed like slow motion, I grab them from her like it was my favorite toy, I ran to the elevator and started beating the hell out of the old elevator buttons.  Please God, don’t let them tow. Please God don’t let them tow……PLEASE…what the hell is wrong with this elevator!  I heard it coming, why do four floors take so long.  It finally got to my floor, I ripped open the elevator door and got in – and had to wait till the outer door closed….it is the longest process ever, this elevator has a mind of it’s own and will not be rushed .  I watched in agony as the outer door slipped its metal locking system into place and I swore under my breath that I would get back at this elevator if it were the cause of the car being towed!

However, I stopped in mid revenge thought; I remembered that this elevator is much more powerful then me!  This old elaborate elevator has controlled the center of power in this apartment building since the 1920’s.  It has seen people come and go, yet it has endured.  However, it is getting old and crotchety; it has a breakdown at least monthly and some times – weekly!  Since I have lived here, it has broken down five times and it seems to be having an on running dispute with the oldest resident of the building. She is a 79 yr. old woman who lives next door!  In four of the five breakdowns, this fiery old woman has been trapped between floors!  The firefighters have to be called and the process of extracting her begins.  I remember all this while I am in this moving tin can and I pray that it is not having a bad day and traps me in midstream.  So instead of thinking of ways to find revenge on this elevator, I whispering sweet words of encouragement that it will safely take me down the 3 levels….please, please, please.

Again, a miracle has happened and I arrive safely to the first floor lobby. She has allowed me safe passage, but as a little reminder that she certainly does control us- she did not line up with the lobby floor and I am lower then the lobby is – I forget to look and I trip into the lobby.  I catch myself as I race to the front doors hoping that I made it.

I cannot see down the street from the main entrance, I try to run but these frecken plastic shoes make that impossible.  I am feeling in my 80’s as I try to jump the three levels of stairs that I have to maneuver to get to the street…..I race to the white car in front of me.

I almost snap my head off as looked up and down the street to spy the Lakewood cop car and the evil tow truck driver starting to upset the lives of the apartment dwellers- those second-class citizens of Lakewood Ohio. But I don’t see them? Where are they?  Did I get the times wrong?  OH, my GOD, did I get the times wrong?  I run to the driver’s side of the car, I look up to see the sign – it is towing at 7AM – It is 7:07am, what happened?  They are like sharks in the water waiting for the click of the 7am chime, what happened?

I am at the beginning of the row of apartment buildings on this road.  Only the apartments park on the street, the big houses on this street all have their cars parked safely in their big yards- only us lowly renters have to be constantly concerned with TIME – what time is it, and what side of the street can I be on at this hour?  The traffic hour of going into Downtown is the reason for this daily dilemma – this is not a main throughway, we have rights! I have to protest this unfair hardship!

I was then slapped back to reality; my guides yelled, “Get in the car!”  I focused back on my quest and the thought hits me like a brick- “OH SHIT, DOES SHE HAVE AN ALARM? Let’s hope not! I frantically tried three different keys in the door panicking as if a chainsaw yielding masked man was coming for me and finally I got one to work. I threw open the door only to find I had to wedge my girth into the lowest, tiny car seat I have ever been in and with one eye on the look out for the dratted Lakewood police, and one on finding the whole to stick the key, I started her up!

I pulled away from the curb as if it had cooties! Pulled in the a driveway and turned around and pulled into a spot on the “allowed” side of the street just as the police pulled up with is flashing lights (on the other side) right behind where I was parked and the process began..

I put the car in park; my heart racing as if I had had just done a triathlon.  I had to un-wedge myself from the seat (I know what a sardine feels like) and I shut the door and clasped against the car. I felt the roar of triumph slam into my throat. I DID IT! They didn’t get me this time! They got me once before when my friend Helen stayed over. It cost me $150.00 bucks and 3 hours of jumping through hoops to locate the car and get her safely inside it. Nevertheless, they did not get me this time!  I WON!  They got no more money from me!  I won!

I sat there basking in my glory.  I watched as the cop car sat diagonally behind the poor soul that was not in tune enough with his guides to have been warned about his error.  I was feeling AMAZING.

Then I noticed that the cars driving past were not celebrating in my victory – they were looking at me with a quizzical look…Why were they looking at me like that? Usually people are like drones, and they look at the flashing lights of the cop car, but they were not, they were all squarely looking at me! Why? What was so compelling about me that I got their attention?

I looked down and was horrified OH NO! NOOOOOOOOOO!

I was standing on a busy morning commute street with my huge electric green plastic shoes, my navy blue, not flattering shorts with legs that have not seen the light of day in over a century and my favorite teal Trading Spaces shirt. That was bad enough…..but I realized in my haste I must of pulled the one and only working button on my shirt open and my girls were hanging out for the world to see!

OH, MY …IS THIS DAY OVER YET?

Communication..BEWARE!

Communication…….or as it has been for me this week a LACK of communication!  In this world of technology, our communication is through email these days.  And it is NOT the best way to talk to others. Two BIG things happened around communication – I think the universe was giving me a BIG lesson…

This week, I have had problems arise in things that I wrote.

I sent off my first article for the http://www.TeeMcBee.com newsletter (What I learned this month by: Kym McBride).  In the article, there was one repetitive word that I italicized to bring emphasis to it.  I felt it was pivotal to the piece.  I sent the article off very happy with the final draft and excited that it would be published in a very good newsletter (and to a very large database of new people!)……I waited with bated breath to get the finished product, so I can send it off to my database…and HOPEFULLY get input to what I think, was a moving-thought provoking article.

Well, when the published newsletter popped in my email box, I was like a kid on Christmas morning…..I ripped it open, and I quickly scanned past all the other information to find my article!  There it was!  I’m published! Only to find that the word “enough” was in the same format as the rest of the article…..I was deflated and then very upset!  Why would the editor change my italicized word? I was not a happy camper.  I felt that by changing the word style, it changed the impact of the story. (PLUS the editor changed a word in a quote, and it completely changed the meaning of the quote! It was NOT a good day!)

Being that it was my sister’s newsletter, I felt I had to step lightly.  I know that she sends all her text to an editor and now that it was published! She would not be able to make the style change…..and once it’s published- what’s the point!  The damage (from my perspective) was done.

I did call my sister and as I anticipated, she didn’t see that it was a cause of concern (does she NOT know emotions of an ARTIST!!?!?!?!  She is an image consultant! What does she know!  I bet if she just dressed a client and I came in and said – I don’t think that scarf is really “needed” in that outfit – that it would NOT go over well with HER!  My WORDS are my craft (one of them) and I think each word is placed at just the right point in my articles to MAKE the article! HOW DARE SHE! (that was said in my best drama queen inflection! and my hand was on my chest just to make the point!)

LESSON Learned!  But I didn’t tell you this part….I was PAST deadline!  My sister had been waiting on me to get this “gem” of an article done…..I HATE to be late, even though I could come up with some great excuses…(My Mom died (really) and we had just had a major memorial for her….and…and) but even I know – none of that mattered, Traci and I share the same Mom, she pushed through…so should I.

So, because of the LATE date, Traci was not able to send me the finalized edited article back to me for final approval. And after all this internal drama, it most likely wasn’t even the editors fault. Traci said that when she puts all the articles in the newsletter, the program changes things to fit the variety of specifications that she has installed, so most likely her PROGRAM changed the italicizing, and not the editor! OK, so I can’t be upset at anyone! Fine!  But the editor DID change the quote…..but I have forgiven her.

Lesson learned- KYM, DON’T wait till the last minute to get your work out!!!  And ALWAYS get a final draft to sign off on!

Lesson learned.  I thought I got it……but I guess on some higher plane-I didn’t….

So the Universe said, “I think Kym needs one more example….”

I write children’s’ books.  OK, I don’t REALLY write them, they are channeled to me.  And what I mean by that, I sit down (when I babysit my nieces) and I tell them a bedtime story and all of a sudden a completely developed story comes pouring out of my mouth!  This is a VERY new cool talent that I have.  I have NEVER been good at making up ANYTHING (I tell great stories, but they are “real” events – not “made up” things)

So I wrote my 3rd children’s book but I do it all on a audio recording, which then means I have to turn to a friend to transcribe (I’m horrible at it!).  I handed her the audio recording with hopes of getting this wonderful story started on the process to getting published.  I was excited!

When I dropped off the recording, the last thing my friend said was, “Do you want me to do the same as it did before with my ideas?” I said, “Yes, that will be fine”.  And I skipped out to the car, happy that the process was beginning.

Well…., that was a few weeks ago and I have heard nothing from my friend and have no transcript in hand.  I wrote a few times, but it seems that things are not going to well for my friend and my book is not her main focus! (Much to my chagrin!…it appears that I am the center of MY UNIVERSE, but I don’t appear to be the Center of HER UNIVERSE! SHOCK!)

So first thing this AM – I had another Christmas day and I found a email from my friend and a attachment of the transcribed book! YEAHHHH!

You know…I really have to stop this “Christmas morning” crap!  It’s like the blue bird of happiness drops something on my head when I do that!….so I open the “transcript” only to find that my friend didn’t do what “we did last time” – she actually MADE THE CHANGES in my original transcript – making this more HER book, then mine!  Last time she had my original transcript and then on the side in color were “suggestions and clarifications” that I could use/change/or insert……but my original story was in tack!…..well, this time it came completely changed…..

So, how do you think I handled it?  Got mad.  Got REAL mad.  Then I realized, WOW, this is just like the other thing….MIS-COMMUNICATION.  She said one thing, I THOUGHT one thing and they were NOT THE SAME THINGS!

So, things are what they are….ANOTHER LESSON that I need to be very CLEAR about my needs. I do not want to make her feel bad, she’s having a hard enough time. I did write her and tell her that in the future I need it as separate items and she isn’t to change anything to the original transcript, but that I do want her input, but on the side and not in the text.

OK, I really REALLY hope that I realize that I have to be very clear with my needs, get things out in a timely manner and KEEP final control over the end product…

I guess something really BIG is going to happen soon, for it appears the Universe wants me to know this lesson before something bigger comes along.

I HEARD YOU BIG GUY – Bring it on!